Sometimes, you just need to believe in yourself a little bit more. I didn’t, and it caused me to seriously doubt all that I have been working for over the past 8+ months.
Case in point. I had worked at my fitness studio’s booth for the local women’s show over the weekend, and had participated in demos every hour for the 2 days that I was there. These demos included us doing either a Groove or Zumba demo, followed by a pole demonstration. There were several other girls taking part in the demonstration, and we all took turns, doing a trick or two or three on the pole before getting down and letting the next girl go. I was probably the most junior person there, so my part consisted of doing a “basic” inversion ( also known as going upside down on the pole), as well as a hold where I climbed and the stretched out, holding on with my legs and one hand. It’s a very pretty move, but hard to describe. Anyways, I digress. There were hundreds of people at this show, and I would guess that hundreds of women watched our demos. I rocked these demos – everyone of them. We all did. It boosted my confidence 1000 fold. It was amazing to watch the looks on the faces of the women watching us, and thinking, “Hey, if she can do that, maybe so can I.” I was on a high all weekend. Then came Monday.
The next day, I went to my normal Monday night pole fit class. I go to this class every week and usually get a great workout in, learn some new tricks, and have a lot of fun. Last week was different. Nothing was working for me. None of the moves that I could do the week, or even the day, before, was sticking and I was getting so frustrated with myself. The inversions, which I had done with ease all weekend, now felt awkward and forced. I had psyched myself out. I came home from class that night almost in tears, wondering how I was going to go back if I could no longer do anything. I vented to some friends on Facebook, and every one of them told me that it was normal, and that everyone had days like that. I honestly doubted that, and thought that it was probably just my lack of ability that had caused it.
I will admit it, I was intimidated at the thought of getting back on the pole. I was no longer feeling confident in what my body (and mind, because don’t let it fool you, it’s also a mental game) would allow me to do. So tonight came, and I tentatively took a spin. I went in there with the attitude that last week was a one-off, and that it was NOT indicative of what I was able to do. I was NOT going to let my mind defeat me, when I had worked so very hard to overcome that attitude in the first place. It took me a few minutes to get my mojo back, but it returned. I worked my butt off, and came out of there with a few new moves, and made up a cool new one of my own.
I think that we don’t give ourselves enough credit sometimes, and that I know that I have been guilty of completely talking myself out of things that I know that I could do. This has to stop. I’m going to start believing in myself and I encourage everyone to do the same. Challenge yourself to try one thing this week that you have doubts about. You may surprise someone, and it’s probably going to be you.